It’s Been a While!

Dodging life’s curve balls!

Well, I am so sorry it has been so long. I have a wonderful friend who texts me when I have gone too long! I LOVE HER! One of my biggest cheerleaders! Life has been good, bad, happy, sad, relaxing, and full of anxiety! Yep, all of those in the 11 days since my last post. But that is life with COVID, 3 kids at home, 1 kid in the Military (and just graduated Basic Training for the Army), a restricted diet, and very low energy because of said restricted diet! But, despite all of that I am plugging along and coping well. I know that losing weight is helping me to be able to cope with life so much better. Weighing over 400 lbs makes it hard to deal with life’s curve balls, but now I am able to see them coming and plan accordingly.

How weight loss is changing my life!

So, as of last Wednesday I have lost 43.7 lbs! I surpassed my first 10% goal! I am feeling great. Exercise is still a struggle. Ok fine, I am not doing much specific exercise, but I am not sitting around on the couch anymore. I am out and about. I can walk all over WalMart now without feeling faint, I am up cleaning house EVERYDAY because the kids are home ALL.THE.TIME! HAHA (The little kids are back to school 2 days a week right now.) I know I need to get out there, but I have been in a bit of a funk. Why? I guess it is just everything. I love my kids, but we are around each other all the time. There is no break of going to work while they go to school much anymore. With COVID I don’t get to see my friends much. I am sick of the 4 walls of my house. The other day I told my oldest son that I regreted having the surgery. I didn’t mean it in the grand scheme of things, but it was just how I felt in that moment. I definitely don’t feel like that today, it was just the stress talking. I know exercise will help. I need to get out and get some fresh air. OK, to my followers, I declare my promise to you all and for myself, that I will start walking on a regular basis today. I will start with 10 to 15 mins of some moderate walking. Today on my lunch break it WILL happen! I am going to start an exercise log and post it like I do my weight log. It will give me some accountability.

My Diet

I have moved on to the soft food diet. This diet consists of soft foods meaning a fork can easily cut through the food. I can eat most any meats. Veggies must be soft cooked. Fruits must have no skins and of course there is always a list of things I can’t eat. My doctor restricts a few things. I can’t eat any oranges (the membrane is too tough), watermelon and grapes. I also can’t eat corn. Right now I am eating 5 meals a day and they total a half cup each. 1/4 cup of protein and a 1/4 cup of a fruit, a veggie, or a starch. We are allowed two fat servings a day like butter, low fat Mayo, low fat cheese, etc. My first meal is to the right. That was the best meal of my life! It tasted so good. I pretty much do an egg every day. This morning I had an egg with some kiwi. Some of my other favorite meals are tuna salad with reduced fat wheat thins (the crackers are on the allowed list of starches), chicken with a veggie, and taco meat with a side of refried beans. At first I thought, a 1/2 cup was never going to be enough food, but it is. I eat slowly, chew my food VERY well, and don’t drink with my meals. I am never hungry so I have to remind myself to eat most of the time. I am down on the # of pills I have to take now. In the morning, I take a multi vitamin, a calcium pill and my anti depressant. In the afternoon I take a b12. In the evening I take a multi vitamin, a calcium pill, my anti depressant and prilosec. It’s not bad and I am in a good routine with taking those now.

How weight loss is changing my life!

It’s only been a month so how much could possibly change? A LOT! It’s amazing how much has changed. Getting in and out of the car is easier. I can bend over and shave my legs. When I get out of bed in the morning I can immediately walk without pain (before I had to stand there and wait before I could move). It’s easier to get off the couch. I have already been able to fit into a seat out in public that I normally wouldn’t have been able to. I want to get up and clean house. My normal walking is faster. I don’t feel restricted wearing my seat belt in the car. I can easily wear tennis shoes since my feet are not swollen. I am down one size in most of my clothes. I have more confidence. I have less anxiety because I can do all these things.

To me, these are all monumental! These things are things that a normal person takes for granted. These are things that I couldn’t do and would give me anxiety just thinking about doing them. It is a snowball affect with losing weight. With each new thing, it gives me a boost. And when I get a boost I want to do more. And when I do more I get a bigger boost. See how this works?

Not every day is perfect or wonderful. I still have anxiety going out. Now, on top of hating people staring at me, I want to run up to them and say, “You should have seen me a month ago!” I want people to know that I am working hard to lose weight. And I still feel judged by people that I don’t even know because they still see me as fat. I am working on this because strangers need not matter to me. It is about me and my family. My family and friends are happy for me and rooting for me. They are the ones that matter.